Titus 2 and Marriage

“Love is a commitment that will be tested in the most vulnerable areas of spirituality, a commitment that will force you to make some very difficult choices. It is a commitment that demands that you deal with your lust, your greed, your pride, your power, your desire to control, your temper, your patience, and every area of temptation that the Bible clearly talks about. It demands the quality of commitment that Jesus demonstrates in His relationship to us.” 
― Ravi Zacharias, I, Isaac, Take Thee, Rebekah: Moving from Romance to Lasting Love

Views on marriage have changed drastically over the years.  No longer is marriage viewed as a commitment, but as something that can be endured.  When one party is done, then they march to the lawyers office and file for divorce.  Sadly, this is against all that Christ wants marriage to be.  He designed marriage to be an earthly example of His love for the church.  As Christian women we have failed to mentor those around us.  We must set examples of biblical marriage.  

Ephesians 5 starting with verse 22 says, "22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, 26 so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 that He might present to Himself the church [q]in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. 28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; 29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, 30 because we are members of His body. 31 For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. 32 This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church.33 Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she [r]respects her husband." 

Many get caught up in the subject of submission.  God did not intend for a man to control his wife.  As verse 25 says, "husbands love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church..." Christ loved the church so much that He died for the church.  Wives are to respect that their husbands are head of home.  We have to understand that every individual is accountable on judgement day.  However, husbands are held to a standard for their families.  I am guilty of wanting to have control over my marriage.  The result was not what I wanted. God has shown me that I must respect my husband, even when I do not understand or agree.  Marriage has held up a mirror to my true self, and at times I do not like that person.  The awesome thing is God and my husband still love me.  Slowly, but surely I am learning what a kingdom woman does in a marriage.

Have you ever been around that one spouse that has nothing good to say about their husband or wife? I have and I feel sad for the spouse.  Society has taught us that bashing our spouses is ok.  Some disguise their hurtful words as humor, but I can promise you the damage is still inflicted.  

Titus 2:3-5 says,"3 Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, 4 so that they may [b]encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored."  Finding a good Titus 2 mentor or becoming a mentor is difficult.  I believe these ladies are held to a high standard.  The church rarely provides instruction or even mentors for younger women.  We are left alone to navigate life.  Growing up I had those around me that I looked up to, but I wish I had one person that could have walked beside me.  I have been blessed with different godly, women along the way and I am grateful for them.  Their impact has helped my marriage, my walk with Christ, and my ministry.  Recently, I started praying that God place a mentor into my life and show me those that need a mentor.  

Do you have a Titus 2 mentor in your life? A word of caution...make sure this woman has a firm foundation in Christ.  A woman that has been a Christian for many years and is obedient to Him.  Are you walking beside someone?  Titus 2 is not regulated to the elderly, but to "older women".  Prayerfully seek the title of mentor, because this is not a job to be taken haphazardly.  

As Kingdom Women we have the responsibility to show the world and those around us Christ.  I believe that if we started doing what scripture tells us, then marriages would stand a better chance.   We must lead by example.  I would love to see a revival in marriages, then peoples perspective on marriage would change.  Christ's love for the church would shine boldly!!

Blessings,

K